|
|
Welcome to the first edition of GWA's Saturday Slam! Slam is the GWA's syndicated program, usually airing on Saturday evenings for just about all the areas that pick up the show. Slam is held in smaller arenas because the stars are not typically in attendance at all the shows. Typically, it is a chance for the less recognized guys to get over, and for some of the more established guys to get a winning streak going. However, Slam is a traditional 'old-school' styled program like WCW Saturday Night from way back in the day. The crowd may be small, but they do love their wrestling action.
Our main event for you this evening is a GWA Junior-Heavyweight Title Match. The Homicidal Threat, coming off a defense against Black Wolf, will go up against the challenge of The Element this week!
Plus, the challenge laid out by Jarvis Rochester has been accepted by Eric Copeland. So tonight we will see a grudge match between "The Nicest Man In Professional Wrestling" Jarvis Rochester and "Aerodynamic" Eric Copeland!
The Super Assassins return to action as they take on The War Gods!
"The Striker" Lance Thompson will go one-on-one with the JR Kidd!
Rapture will face off against Jeremy Jergens!
But now, let's go down to the ring for our first match!
The fans cheered loudly for Cameron Cannon as he did one of his goofy dances around the ring before the match started. However, the ex-daredevil, Crash rained on his party by attacking him before the bell rang!
Crash landed some decent offensive moves in on "Cutting Edge", including a power bomb which earned Crash a very near fall from referee Peter Larson. However, Crash made the mistake of turning and yelling at the crowd, who didn't like his attitude. As Crash turned around, he caught a big dropkick in the face from Cameron Cannon which pleased the crowd!
Cannon hit a fireman's carry into an Ace Crusher on Crash before heading upstairs and unbelievably hitting a move that can only be described as a -Frog Legdrop-!!! Part frog splash, part flying legdrop. After a couple of more creative moves, it was all over. Cannon hit the Dragon Driver '99 for the 1, 2, 3!
Cameron Cannon pinned Crash with the Dragon Driver '99 in 0:06:37
Rating: ** 1/4
After the match, Michael Greenwood and Sam Reed went over a small highlight package detailing what has gone down in the GWA since Crowning Glory, plus a preview of what Breakdown next week may look like.
***Commercial Break***
Young and energetic Jeremy Jergens couldn't really do much to earn a win here tonight against Rapture. He was pretty much dominated from bell to bell.
Jergens got in a couple of clothesline and a hiptoss at the start, but that was it. Rapture blocked a spin kick attempt and took Jergens out with his own spin kick. Rapture picked the young man up and hit a Russian legsweep, followed up by a big DDT to the canvas!
Rapture scooped Jergens up and nailed him with a shoulderbreaker, and then went to the air, nailing Jergens with a flying elbowdrop! A slingshot splash and a front face driver later, Rapture hit The Penance on Jeremy Jergens for an easy victory.
Rapture defeated Jeremy Jergens with The Penance in 0:05:15
Rating: * 3/4
Afterwards, Rapture grabbed a mic, as the strangely masked man peered into the camera.
Rapture: Nothing.... will stop me.... building my empire.... and conquering all of you!!!
With those cryptic words said, Rapture tossed the microphone down and headed to the locker rooms. Backstage, Ken Sinclair was standing by with Kid Dynamite.
Sinclair: A good win for Rapture there, wrestling fans. I'm standing here with Kid Dynamite, who was a participant in the 3-Way Dance for the Junior-Heavyweight Title match at Crowning Glory. It's been 8 days now since that match... how do you feel Kid Dynamite?
Dynamite: (A hick attempting a pathetic British accent.) Well, let me tell y'all somethin'. My name isn't just Kid Dynamite. That may be my 'rasslin name, but my real name is.....
Sinclair: (Interrupting. He covers the mic and whispers something about 'kayfabe'.)
Dynamite: Hey, git yer filthy mits offa me! I don't give a scrap about that stuff. All these fans out here know who I am! I've been 'rasslin for years! I was one half of the WWF World Tag Team Champions! I've even 'rassled in Japan... or China or something... who cares.
Sinclair: Still, you shouldn't give out....
Dynamite: I'll give out my real name if I want to! It seems to me like you don't believe I'm the real Kid Dynamite! Well I'll proove it to you! My name just happens to.... John Tillington! Yeah baby!
Cut back to the broadcasters.
Greenwood: -John- -Tillington-?!!! Who in the hell does he think he's fooling?
Reed: What a moron!
Greenwood: We apologize fans, we'll be right back.
***Commercial Break***
Thompson was the clear favorite coming into this match, and it showed throughout the match.
Thompson started off with a series of very nice kicks on JR Kidd, who didn't know quite what had hit him. Thompson landed a spinwheel kick that sent JR Kidd out of the ring and to the arena floor. Wanting to beat JR Kidd inside the ring, Thompson left him outside, which nearly resulted in a countout win for Lance Thompson, but JR Kidd barely clambered back into the ring before he was counted out.
JR Kidd managed to fight back though. He landed a cross body block on Lance Thompson, and then hit a springboard clothesline onto "The Striker". JR went upstairs, but was caught napping, and Thompson powerslammed JR Kidd down from the very top turnbuckle to the canvas!
Thompson then locked on a series of submission holds to wear down Kidd. A kneelock submission, followed up by an armbar submission, and then into an ankle lock submission, finished off when Lance Thompson locked on the Double Heel Hook! The pain was too much for JR Kidd and he tapped out to the hold.
Lance Thompson made JR Kidd submit to the Double Heel Hook in 0:09:51
Rating: **
Lance Thompson released the hold and left the ring, as his manager and mentor, Mario Zandani patted him on the back as they both left toward the locker rooms.
***Commercial Break***
After failing to win the GWA Tag Team Titles at Crowning Glory, The Super Assassins have no choice but to climb their way up the ranks to get another chance at the titles. They started that journey off tonight on Slam.
Assassin # 1 started out with Ares, and it looked at first as if The War Gods were going to steal a win from the Assassins. Ares nailed # 1 with a series of quick clotheslines, followed up by a fallaway slam to the canvas. Mars was tagged in and hit a military press slam for the two count.
Mars went to work on Assassin # 1 with some power moves, but # 1 hit a thumb to the eye and tagged out to his partner. # 2 came in and nailed Mars with a side slam, and then locked on the spinning toe hold submission. Okay... we're getting -really- old school here... but that's cool.
Assassin # 2 whipped Mars into the ropes and went for a backdrop, but Mars leapfrogged over him and caught the Assassin with a back heel kick to the jaw! Ares was soon tagged in, and Assassin # 2 was against the ropes! Ares went upstairs and hit a flying axehandle, followed by a vertical suplex!
Ares went for the cover... 1, 2, 3? No!!! Referee Robert Taylor said no, but it looked like a certain three count! At this point, Assassin # 1 jumped into the ring and attacked Ares, flattening him. Taylor backed # 1 out of the ring, but now Mars was attempting to enter the ring, and Taylor had to restrain him.
As the ref's back was turned, The Super Assassins pulled the oldest of old school tricks you could possibly pull.... THE OLD SWITCHAROO!!! HA HA HA!!! DON'T YOU LOVE IT?!!! Assassin # 1 rolled # 2 out of the ring and took his place! As a groggy Ares went over to the man he thought was Assassin # 2, Assassin # 1 popped him in the head with a right hand, and then took him down with a snap mare.
Assassin # 1 nailed Ares with a backbreaker, followed up by an elbow from the second turnbuckle. # 1 booted Ares in the gut and then clobbered him with a Jerry Lawler style piledriver! This match was as good as done!
The Super Assassins defeated The War Gods when Assassin # 1 pinned Ares after a piledriver in 0:10:44
Rating: ** 1/2
Hey, just because it's an old school match doesn't mean it has bad workers in it.
We briefly went backstage, where "The Nicest Man In Professional Wrestling" Jarvis Rochester was 'preparing' for his match by jumping rope in the most sissy of ways possible.
***Commercial Break***
Copeland entered first to Metallica's "Blackened". A song which can certainly get any crowd pumped.
However, his opponent entered next to.... "It's Not Unusual" by Tom Jones, which instantly took the crowds adrenaline away. Rochester, with his tennis racquet in hand, struted down to the ring with a microphone in hand. Apparently he was going to bore us to death with his words of wisdom before the match...
Rochester: Hello Pittsburgh!!!
Pittsburgh? What the hell is this guy smoking?
Rochester: Pittsburgh, I have some rather sad news for you. However, this news that I bear to you great people is not sad for "Aerodynamic" Eric Copeland. For this news means that I will not be able to compete and DESTROY the pathetic pestilence known as Eric Copeland on this fine evening.
Copeland looked annoyed by this. He grabbed the mic from Rochester.
Copeland: What the hell are talking about?
He shoved the mic back into Rochester's chest.
Rochester: Well... you see... while I was in the back just now preparing for my big match tonight... I uh... well, I kind of sprained my pinky finger... and well, I'm afraid to say that I can't compete tonight. Sorry. [A horribly fake sorrowful expression is on Rochester's face.]
At this point the crowd is chanting something to the effect of "Bull----!" over and over, when Rochester interjects.
Rochester: But do not be discouraged my people... for I have found a suitable replacement for myself tonight. That's right... give it up for the latest cruiserweight sensation to hit the GWA...... KILLER BEAR!!!!!!!!!
With that said, "Ace of Spades" by Motorhead blared, and the big Kentuckian stormed his way towards the ring. The crowd looked bemused, as Greenwood and Reed vented their disgust towards this.
Greenwood: Seriously, what kind of a lame excuse is a 'sprained pinky'? I'll bet he doesn't even have a doctor's opinion on that....
Reed: Uh....
Greenwood: What the hell am I saying?!! The injury's completely bogus! I can't believe Bill Nash is letting this go!
Reed: And what's this about Killer Bear being a CRUISERWEIGHT?!!! The man weighs over 300 pounds! This is a complete mismatch!
So now we had a revised card.
Rochester stood outside the ring and played cheerleader for Killer Bear as he and Copeland locked up in the center of the ring.
Immediately, Bear shoved Copeland down onto his rear posterior on the canvas. Copeland got back up, angered, and jumped at Bear with a big forearm to the face! Copeland let loose with a flurry of forearms, and then whipped the big man into the ropes. Copeland went for a double leg lariat, but Killer Bear caught him and dumped him onto the canvas with an overhead belly-to-belly suplex!!!
Killer Bear sent himself off into the ropes and came down with a huge splash onto the "Aerodynamic" one! Bear stayed on top of Copeland for the cover! 1, 2, foot on the ropes by Copeland! The crowd popped for him, the obvious underdog now.
Bear picked Copeland up by a handful of hair and shoved him into the corner and immediately started choking the life out of him with his boot. Copeland shoved Killer Bear backwards for a moment and jumped up to the top turnbuckle, attempting a Tornado DDT on Killer Bear, but Bear stopped in midair with Copeland and dropped him with a vicious spinebuster slam!!!
Rochester jumped up and down, clapping for Killer Bear, who simply growled at him. Rochester either bought Bear a lot of steak, or a lot of beer to be on his side this evening.
Bear took his time, stalking around the ring, yelling at the crowd, and generally ignoring Eric Copeland, who was on the canvas in pain.... or at least, he was a moment ago. Bear looked up to catch a missile dropkick in the mush from Eric Copeland!!! Copeland ran into the ropes and hit a springboard legdrop across the throat of the big man! A comeback in the making!
Copeland ran into the ropes again, but this time Rochester swung his arm out and caught Copeland by the ankle, preventing him from running. Copeland lifted his boot up and stomped unmercilessly onto Rochester's pinky... probably -really- injuring it this time. However, the distraction was enough. Copeland turned to be viciously kicked in the midsection and then scooped up for the Bear Claw, Killer Bear's running powerslam finisher!
Killer Bear defeated Eric Copeland with the Bear Claw in 0:07:36
Rating: **
What a friggin' ripoff! Now Rochester jumped into the ring with his racquet and whacked Copeland with it repeatedly. Rochester invited Killer Bear to join in on the fun, and he did, by splashing the life out of the now defenceless Eric Copeland.
Suddenly the crowd popped loudly for the appearance of "The Fury" Robin Banks, in regular street clothes, who charged to the ring and hit a slingshot clothesline onto Killer Bear! "The Fury" quickly shot himself up to the top rope and cleaned Jarvis Rochester's clock with a Flash Kick - the top rope spin kick - to the face! Banks had taken out the trash! The ring was clear, as Rochester backed away from the ring, sporting a very sore jaw and pinky now.
***Commercial Break***
It's main event time kiddies!
The Homicidal Threat emerged from the back, wearing his usual attire of jean shorts and some kind of heavy metal t-shirt, tonight's being an AC/DC shirt, with the Junior-Heavyweight Title thrust across his shoulder. Not exactly the first guy you would picture if you thought of the word, 'champion'.
His opponent, The Element, is more of an American version of a luchadore. However, The Element does not speak very often. It seems as if he had survived more than one holocaust and come out alive.
The two locked up as the bell rung. Immediately, Threat hiptossed The Element down to the canvas. The Element took Threat down with a legsweep from the mat and attempted an elbow drop, but The Homicidal Threat quickly rolled away and went for a corkscrew legdrop, but The Element rolled away in time. The Element went for a spin kick to the head of HT, but Threat ducked and took The Element down with a single-leg takedown! Threat made a cover but only got a one count. Both men got up and faced off with one another, nose to nose!
The crowd applauded both men as they locked up again. The Homicidal Threat whipped The Element into the ropes and attempted to backdrop him to the arena floor, but The Element landed on the apron and hit HT with a slingshot bodyblock! The resulting cover only got The Element a two though.
The Element went upstairs and attempted a moonsault, but The Homicidal Threat rolled away at the last moment! Threat got up and hit The Element with a handspring leg lariat across the throat that took The Element down! Threat hit a slingshot senton onto The Element for a close two and a half count.
Threat picked The Element up and went for a power bomb, but The Element countered with a hurricanrana! The Element went outside onto the apron for a springboard type move, but HT quickly got back up and dropkicked The Element off of the apron and down into the guardrail!
The Element got back up to receive a beautiful tope con hilo from The Homicidal Threat!!! A huge crowd pop reverberated throughout the Convention Center for The Homicidal Threat as he chucked The Element back into the ring and headed up to the top rope!
Threat launched himself off the top with the redirectional frog splash, the Pure Homicide, and hooked the legs of The Element for the 1, 2, 3 and another successful title defence.
The Homicidal Threat pinned The Element with the Pure Homicide in 0:08:13
Rating: *** 3/4
(The Homicidal Threat retained the GWA Junior-Heavyweight Title.)
An hour's worth of wrestling action concludes with The Homicidal Threat celebrating his title defence in the ring. Join us again next week, where we'll be eminating once again from the Asbury Park Convention Center for another edition of GWA Saturday Slam!
© 2001 Global Wrestling Association